Hello all!
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| City Hall in San Francisco at Christmas-time |
I am sorry for how long it has been since my last blog post.
I think this is a new low for me… Last I posted it was Christmas time and all
the busyness and funness of Christmas was underway. Christmas at home was
absolutely amazing. It was so great to see family and friends that I have
missed. It was an incredibly busy week at home but that meant I got to do a lot
of fun things and see a lot of wonderful people. I enjoyed all of the holiday
festivities as well as getting to go snowboarding with my family in Michigan
for a little family vacation. Thank you all for the wonderful memories and
great times while I was home. Leaving Michigan knowing that I wouldn’t be back
for a long while was one of the most difficult things that I have been through
this entire time I have been in California.
After
leaving Michigan I didn’t get much time to be sad because I had to jump back into
work with CSM right away. My flight got in at midnight on the 1st
and we had a group come the next day. This group of high school and college
students was a super goofy fun group to lead. They left on Sunday morning and
another group came that evening. The second group was a college group for
Turlock California that was really great. It was a very busy turn around from
Michigan, to the first group, to the second group with getting only a few hours
in-between each thing. Needless to say I was very exhausted after the second
group left and had a nice day of rest after they left.
On Sunday when the college group from
Turlock had just arrived I had a really awesome challenging experience. We had
eaten dinner and were starting the prayer tour in Civic Center. I was exhausted
but ready to inform those in my group about some of the issues within the city
of San Francisco. While I was beginning a woman came up to our group asking if
we were doing some sort of prayer tour. When I answered yes she said she wanted
to listen and stood slightly at a distance. I continued with the introduction
to the park. As I continued she approached me specifically asking me about my
shoes. I was wearing almost 10-year-old converse shoes and was confused why she
was so interested in them. As she got closer she started to become very
aggressive and threatened to hurt me. I was frozen. I was concerned for my
personal safety because clearly this woman was under the influence of something
and I wasn’t sure what she would do. Even more than my personal safety I didn’t
know how to handle this situation with the group. My stomach flipped, my palms
were sweating, and I was trembling. I brought the group to a different spot in
the park to finish the prayer tour and thankfully the woman left us.
When
we got back into the car the very first thing the group’s leader did was ask if
someone could pray for that woman. Right away a few people offered to pray and
we lifted this woman up in prayer. Although I was set out to teach this group
about San Francisco they ended up being such an example to me. After that woman
left I was incredibly angry with her. I had done absolutely nothing to her to
deserve her threats. I was still shaken up a bit and I knew it was going to
affect me throughout the prayer tour. When they lifted her up in prayer all the
negative feelings I was filled with vanished. I pray for myself and for those I
care about frequently but I rarely pray for those that upset me. God asks us to
even pray for our enemies and I was reminded of this through the example of
this group. It impacted me strongly and I am so glad that I got the opportunity
to lead this group.
Since the hosting
has slowed down I have been busy working on some other projects. It has been so
nice to get back into a normal rhythm of life and to able to go to my church
more consistently again has been awesome. I am currently working on a pre-visit
video for CSM San Francisco. Normally we have group leaders that have never
been on a CSM trip before come on a pre-visit. During this time we go over a
lot of logistical issues as well as give them a tour of our housing site. We
also take them out to lunch and show them around San Francisco and Oakland a
little. This allows us to point out some of our ministry sites and give them a
feel of what it’s like to be in the Tenderloin neighborhood for example.
Although pre-visits are great they are also expensive. They are expensive on the
group’s part because they have to pay for travel expenses and it is expensive
on our part because we take them out to lunch every time. It is also can just
take up a lot of time because we usually do one a month and they take most of
the workday to do. Due to these reasons CSM has asked every city to put
together a pre-visit video with all of this information so the leaders can
simply watch the video and have a follow up phone call instead of spending all
the time and money for an in person pre-visit. I have been assigned to do the
pre-visit video. This is a big undertaking as there is a lot that goes into all
of it, but I am getting somewhere and plugging pretty hard at it.
Recently at BARM, the after school program I have been working at, I
have been talking about ways I could get more involved than I had been
previously in 2012. I don’t want to just be another volunteer, but I want to
actually be thinking of creative ways that I can actually impact the King’s
Club with. I also want to be able to spend more time invested into BARM during
the week when I am not actually at the King’s Club through planning and such.
My
first idea was to create a vegetable garden with the flower boxes they have
just sitting in the backyard. My hope is to be able to do the
planting and care alongside some of the students. By having the garden I think
it could create some maturity as they have to care for something other than
themselves. The responsibility that it takes to grow plants could create growth
in the students. I also just think the simple lesson of how to grow plants
would be a cool thing for them to be able to experience. And hopefully we could
actually eat something we grow eventually! I am really exciting about working
this out and getting everything underway with this project. I plan to do the
actual planting sometime in the near future. I will keep you all posted!
My
other idea that I am in the process of working out is to start leading a teen girl’s bible time on
Tuesdays and Thursdays. I have been spending more and more time with the youth
and am definitely spending more time with the youth than the elementary now. On
Wednesday one of their staff named Jesse talked to me about leading a talk that
day on relationships after an incident that happened on Tuesday evening. With
this being an issue talked about best in a split gender atmosphere and with it
being one of my passions to discuss with girls it got me thinking. A few nights
ago I talked to the director of the program, Marshelle, for a long time about
my thoughts about the teen bible study and how I would love to be more invested
into it. Marshelle loved the idea of splitting the girls and guys and was on
board with everything I was thinking. I know Jesse has been working on what he
wants to do with the teens for these next few months in bible study. I emailed
Jesse last night about my thought and plan to talk to him on Tuesday when I am
there next. From what Marshelle was saying it sounds like him and her have some
different opinions on what the next few months will look like for the teen
bible study, so I hope everything works out. I would love to have the complete
freedom to do what I want with the girl’s on the days that I am there.
I
am really excited about being able to be more invested in BARM for the next few
months. I find myself getting so excited when I start thinking of new ways for
me to be involved. I am also really excited to be able to spend even more time
with the teens specifically since teens are really one of my passions. I am
looking forward to where everything is going to go and where God is going to
move. I pray that while I am getting more invested that I remain humble and
dedicated to working for the Kingdom and not just for myself. I pray that if
everything works out with the teen girl’s time that God will give me wisdom to
know what to say when difficult topics come up. I also pray for wisdom on a
daily basis with the teens to know what to say in the constant situations that
come up that are difficult.
After
all that writing I have pretty much filled you all in on the last few weeks in
the life of Rachel. Sorry for the extreme length but it’s been quite a while so
it’s only natural. Please be praying for all these projects and me over these
next few weeks. Just be praying that they come to fruition in the way in which
God intends them. Also I ask for you all to praying for my decisions regarding
my future. I have been thinking a lot about returning to North Park in the fall.
With these thoughts I have also considered transferring for the summer to CSM
Chicago to do hosting instead of finishing here in the summer. This is all very
early and therefore could very easily not end up working out. I
think hosting in Chicago would be an awesome experience that would allow me to
expand my knowledge and heart for the city. This would also give me an idea
about the ministry sites in the area that I could hopefully partner with more
long term. One of my favorite things about the apprenticeship so far has been
being able to invest in the after school program I work at. I would absolutely
love to be able to find a ministry in Chicago that I could invest myself into
for the remainder of my schooling. Hosting in Chicago would also give me another
entirely different perspective on ministry and specifically how CSM looks in a
different city. I also just love the hosting that I have been able to do out
here and I think it would be a really awesome experience in general to host
exclusively this summer. Please pray for these decisions that God will have his
will in them and that whatever ends up working out will be for His glory. Thanks again for all your prayers and
care. It is so wonderful to know how many people I have on my team praying and
supporting me through this. I hope you all are doing well and would love to
hear some ways I could be praying for you as well.
